The Boundary Code

The Boundary Code

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The Boundary Code
The 7 Biggest Myths About Setting Boundaries and How They Might Be Hurting Your Chances at Love

The 7 Biggest Myths About Setting Boundaries and How They Might Be Hurting Your Chances at Love

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The Boundary Code
Jun 18, 2025
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The Boundary Code
The Boundary Code
The 7 Biggest Myths About Setting Boundaries and How They Might Be Hurting Your Chances at Love
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a couple sits on a rock looking out over a lake

Let’s be honest: most people don’t grow up learning how to set boundaries. We’re taught how to please, how to perform, how to avoid conflict, but rarely how to name our needs without guilt, or how to hold our line without fearing we’ll lose love.

And because of that, boundaries have become deeply misunderstood.

Boundaries are often seen as confrontational or selfish. But in emotionally attuned, value-driven relationships, boundaries are an invitation to connection, not a punishment.

They’re mutually beneficial agreements that allow two people to stay aligned without self-abandonment. They’re how we honor both closeness and individuality at the same time.

Yet many people sabotage their relationships by buying into the wrong limiting beliefs.

Here are the 7 biggest myths about boundaries and the emotional and relational damage they quietly cause when left unchecked.

And before we dive into each myth, I am writing this article because people are thinking trauma-informed boundaries are the same as relational boundaries and wondering why their relationships aren’t becoming better, stronger, healthier, and long-lasting.

I want to clear the air so you have clarity, curiosity, and a compass for connecting without fear. If boundaries are set where each person has a voice then there’s less confusion. Its a discussion, not a demand.

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